IT WAS ON THE LABEL
On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
(What is this, the "Shoplifter Special?")
On Swanson frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's just a suggestion, mind you.)
On Tesco's tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): Do not turn upside down.
(Well now you tell me!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating.
(That's a relief.)
On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use.
(I'm afraid to ask!)
On Salisbury's peanuts. Warning: Contains nuts.
(Truth in advertising prevails!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: Open packet. Eat nuts.
(Thanks for the pointers!)